Stubborn
How stubborn is my Haflinger? Occasionally I’ve wondered how long it would take to wait her out when she decides the answer is “no”. I have my answer.
I’ve mentioned previously that during some conditioning rides, she gets ‘stuck’ and refuses to go forwards. There doesn’t appear to be any fear involved. Those episodes feel very different and are given much more tolerance.
Pre-Christmas, Confetti and I zipped out for what should have been a moderately paced solo ride. It was the middle of the day, sunny, not muddy, good headspace on my part. We moseyed our way up to the top, a little slower than I’d thought. Then we headed down the other side of the loop, had a lovely canter up a sandy hill.. the world felt wonderful and alive and amazing.
She threw the brakes on a minute later heading downhill through the steps. Dead stop. Clearly going to die can’t possibly move forwards. I kicked, smacked, took a deep breath, and summoned every ounce of patience that I had. I was not going to get off. The park was quiet. We had plenty of time. If I was late to dinner in four or five hours, so be it. I was not going to get off.
We started with lateral work. Could she go sideways on the step? Yes, she could. Sideways both ways? Fine. I want to climb up the side of the hill and go that way! she says. No. On the trail. Can you take a step down? No. OK. Lateral again. Pause. Breathe. OK. Insist on forwards, persistent nagging kicks and occasional swats. Any forwards motion and I’d quit. Try to go off the side of the trail while going forwards and I’d haul her nose back to the trail and smack hard. Sometimes that led to her going back up the step, but that’s the rules: stay on the trail.
We made it a few steps down, eventually, and continued: her refusal, my insistence. I don’t want to. You have to. She braced through her neck, so in our halt-breaks I’d flex her left and right, then back to forward-insistence. Somewhere along the process, I pushed too hard for more forwards, and she went backwards up the steps instead – multiple steps. Pretty impressive. Pretty frustrating! Forwards and lateral and forwards again we went, quarter steps half steps thoughts of forward.
Thirty-some minutes in I called my boyfriend to let him know I might be late for dinner, but that this was a conversation I was going to finish out. Naturally, I kept up the forward-insistence with my legs while I talked – she wasn’t moving anyway, so what was the harm? She took the opportunity to go forwards up the side of the hill since I had one hand on the phone, which promptly gave way underneath her. I snapped my phone back into the holster, took up both reins, said some extraordinarily impolite things as for the first time ever I feared my pony might fall over, re-established balance on solid ground, and picked the phone back up. Unfortunately for me, the iPhone microphone does pick up fairly well from one’s hip, and my poor boyfriend confirmed later that he heard everything. Oops.
On the bright side, it was only a minute or two later when she decided she was done resisting, and leg really did mean forwards, and we went zooming down the trail: one pissed off pony, one moderately tired rider.
Forty minutes. Maybe a hundred feet.
Way too stubborn. I do not have this patience.
I love the pony even when I’m threatening to beat her. In all fairness, I knew the stubborn when I acquired her, so that’s totally on me. Not sure I’d do it for any other horse, though.
I’m glad you waited her out. I predict that the next time the wait will be less until she realizes that she is not going to manipulate you that way any more.
That’s what I’m hoping! This is the first time we’ve been able to have the full discussion. Every other instance has ended with other folks showing up on the trail and/or the situation being unsafe (standing still in a blind spot in a bike-popular area.. not a good option).
Good for you! I’m sorry she’s so stubborn, but glad that you’re even more stubborn than your horse! She’ll learn, but will probably always test you.
I once spent an entire two hour trail ride going back and forth over a probably quarter-mile section so my horse wouldn’t jig home. Not what I’d planned for the day, but doing things on their schedule, “horse time” not human-looking-at-their-watch time is sometimes required.
Absolutely. Sometimes I love the stubborn streak, sometimes not so much.
Not jigging home: that one may be next on our list when I have a free day and dry trails!
Omg so stubborn! Sounds like you are more stubborn though, so you’ve got this 🙂
We’re pretty evenly matched. She’s taught me lots of stubborn over the past few years 🙂
yikes. i applaud your patience tho – i’d struggle with avoiding escalating the situation… hopefully it’s a lesson she’ll remember for next time tho!
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